Posts tagged Star Trek

It was entertaining/worth the money, but…

Yep, there’s always a but, isn’t there?  Here’s the thing, J.J. Abrams’ new Star Trek, which had a huge opening this weekend, was energetic, featured a fantastic cast, had great special effects (CGI); over all was well done for a blockbuster.  BUT…and I say this with much love and giddiness for J.J. Abrams, the guy needs to chill on that whole time travel thing (that’s all I’m going to say b/c I don’t want to give too much away for those of you who haven’t seen it yet).  OMG, enough.  We get it, you are obsessed with time travel. Who the hell isn’t??  However, for someone as talented as you, yes, I am directly speaking to Mr. Abrams now because that’s how seriously annoyed I am, you should be able to tap into other sci-fi subjects, and then find ways to meld them to morph into other innovative plotlines and concepts.

I mean, c’mon, you were the one that said, “let’s have black smoke and polar bears on the tropical deserted island.” And we lapped it up.

You also said “let’s have a show with a conspiracy theory that pertains to a future paranormal war.” And we’ve been eating it up like it’s the greatest steak dinner ever.

So, I think you’ve explored that time travel thing enough, it’s time to get on another tangent, and boldly go where no one has gone before.  (Oh, and be sure to cast Chris Pine (the new James T. Kirk), he is dreamy and swell and out-cools Shia LaBeouf’s ass any day.)

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Never fear, fanboys/girls will save the world (economy), one blockbuster at a time

May the force be with you as you use your hard-earned allowance on movie tickets and popcorn

May the force be with you as you use your hard-earned allowance on movie tickets and popcorn

What is that I hear?  Spaceships and gigantic talking robots? Lasers and things blowing up? Ah, the sounds of summer movie season=the end of the recession? 

Obama may have put together an elaborate plan to break us out of this economic crisis, but Hollywood has been busy in back rooms and underground lairs working on their own stimulus package…and my friends, here it is:

May 1 – X-Men Origins: Wolverine (starring Hugh Jackman, Ryan Reynolds and Liev Schreiber, directed by Gavin Hood).

May 8 – Star Trek (Directed by JJ Abrams**, starring Chris Pine, Zachary Quinto, Simon Pegg and like a thousand other people, holy crap, that list is long!).

May 21 – Terminator Salvation (starring Christian “get out of my sight” Bale, Bryce Dallas Howard and Helena Bonham Carter, directed by McG**)

June 24 – Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (Directed by Michael Bay**, starring Shia LeBeouf, Megan Fox, and a lot of the kids from the first movie)

July 17 – Harry Potter & The Half-Blood Prince (starring all the same old Brits, directed by David Yates)

August 7 – G.I. Joe: The Rise of the Cobra (starring Channing Tatum, Dennis Quaid and Joseph Gordon-Levitt, directed by Stephen Sommers**)

 

**Member of Hollywood’s Special Forces Economy-Resurrection Unit, a collective of  blockbuster directors who live to make geeky/tech-y/built-in fanbase movies that premiere during the summer and will include fast-food, soda, and toy/action figure marketing promotions.

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